Thursday, January 10, 2008

We weren't angels/Vic

As a five year old child I would spend an afternoon at the theater with my older brothers Vic and Dennis. One particular afternoon we headed off to see some monster marathon and upon entering the movie house I had been inflicted with a mild case of laryngitis. I knew it would be useless to scream at any movie monsters, so during the shows I was content to just sit in my chair as tense as a frozen log in winter.As we exited the theater and started on our way home we passed Mrs. Johnson, an energetic, happy old lady who greeted us with..."Hello boys".
We had been taught to be polite and that a return address was expected, so I tried to get out a "Hello Mrs. Johnson" of my own to mind my manners.
To my surprise, the greeting came out full of energy and in strong voice. It seemed my laryngitis was miraculously gone. In a joyous state I walked along the street continuing in my polite mode..."Hello Mrs. Johnson...good morning...hi there..."
I was talking out loud to no one as a result of the surprising rediscovery of my voice.Vic and Dennis had slowed to a near stop and let me continue on ahead of them, much amuzed at my babbling conversation with an invisible woman. After five seconds of walking and talking I realized there was a good round of laughing going on behind me. When I turned and realized my brothers were having a good laugh at my expense I became immdiately outraged and ran back to inflict a wound on their laughing lips.Dennis was closer to my age and height so I was going to hit him first. I reached my arm back and was getting ready to land a big, right handed haymaker when Vic stepped in to save Dennis. Vic caught my hand in flight towards Dennis's mouth and easily pushed me up against the store building we were passing by. This only enraged me more so I took a swing at Vic with my left arm that was free. I hit him only once in the chest when he took my left arm and also pinned it up against the building. I had a nasty reputation as being a volcano as a little child and was not about to let this chaining of my arms end my angry eruption, so I started kicking Vic in the shins as violently as I good seeing how I couldn't hit him with my arms. Vic had been in battles with me before and knew how to counter act the flailing of my legs. He simply pushed his knees into my legs, thus completely nailing me to the side of the building.
There we were, the three, hardly united Musketeers. I was completely harnessed now by Vic physically, but still had another weapon ready to unleash upon him. My mouth was now working very well as the laryngitis had disappeared and I stuck my face forward and shouted out as loudly as I could...
"Shit!!!"
Vic's face had an instant look of shock. I could see I now had the upper hand.
"Shit! Shit! Shit!"
I started yelling out as loudly as I could.Vic would have none of this profanity so he let go of my right hand so he could cover my mouth to shut me up. With my hand now free I started pummeling his face as best I could to get my anger out of me and inflict some just punishment. Again, Vic found himself in a dilemma. Should he uncover my mouth and protect himself? Of course he should!!! I was now beating the crap out of him.
When Vic grabbed my hand to push it back against the building to save himself I started with my profanities again...
"Shit shit shit..."
There was no winning the battle for Vic so he let me go completely and backed away about five feet. I was steaming mad, but had used up about all the energy I had left so I just stood there looking at both Vic and Dennis. Dennis had been a bystander through this short war Vic and I had just waged and was the first one to start in with conversation.
"I'm going to tell Mom and Dad...."
I knew I was in trouble.My anger subsided immediately as I made a plan of how I was going to run away from home...it seemed the only way I could escape the long arm of parental law.

5 comments:

Amy said...

I haven't heard that story before. Now I understand that these angry genes must be hereditary.... this sounds like a mix of Garrett and Zander!! haha!! No wonder Garrett likes you so much, you two can relate!
Thanks for the story. They always bring a smile to my face.

Jen and Allen said...

Ok now you need to start putting ratings on all your entries so I know what stories will damage my innocence... Hum but knowing you and that lot you grew up with I may not get to read any of your posts after you do that. He He He.
Thanks for sharing your memories it makes me feel not so far way from every one. Love you Uncle Ricky, Jen

Lori Buhr said...

Your e-mail said to let you know what I thought of this post...well I could just see it in my mind. Being smaller myself I know what it is like to have others pin you down and gang up on you. (I bet you don't remember holding me down with Ronnie and tickling me until I laughed and then stuffing dirty socks in my mouth to make me quit screaming) But, I thought you should have had your mouth washed out with soap and you better be glad that Roberta wasn't there or she would have told on you for sure! Speaking of tempers, I still have mine. It is alive and well, just waiting to be unleashed on some poor unsuspecting soul.

Carmen said...

I love reading all of your stories. You make it so real through your writing! Thanks for letting us get to know you and your family even better. By the way, thanks so much for all of your support.

Angela said...

I remember you telling me this story too! However many times I hear it, it still makes me laugh!

Ang